24 July 2010
Today is suppose to be out date. But you are having a company dinner tonight. So, in what way is it a date when you have to eithera) Send me home at 5+, so that you can prepare for the dinner, or
b) Leave me somewhere alone till you finish your dinner.
How about standing in my shoes and think about why am I so upset today and chose not to tell you about it?
So what if I tell you how I feel? All you'll say is this is company dinner, what can I do? I got no choice. Can't you try to be more understanding, etc etc etc...Yada yada yada... And it'll all turn out to be my fault again.
You got no mood to go for movie anymore also my fault, when you are coughing like mad and I'm not enjoying myself at all. If you had taken the Chinese medicine, which you yourself choose to buy at the medicinal hall yesterday, on time, you would have been much better today! I asked you nicely have you finished your medicine, all I get is, It's very bitter, I don't want to drink. I'm not going to see a western doctor or take any western medicine after this. Come on! Western medicine, you say not good. Chinese medicine, you say too bitter, you don't want to drink. Then how the hell are you going to get better?! Tell me lahz!
I don't like injections, I still must have it, for the sake of your daughter. I don't like eating medicine, I still have to take it ON TIME for the sake of your daughter! Can't you just finish the medicine for the sake of yourself?! So that you won't cough till so fucking hard? Keep coughing very shuang arhz?! You know you are coughing fucking badly, yet still want to smoke! Then now I know I'm very pregnant, can I smoke too?!
讲你两句，你就不爽。不讲你，你又说我不关心你。你到底想要怎样?!
If you were the one who has to stay home everyday not being able to walk about and have to confine to the bed alone, without your partner to accompany you, how would you feel?
If your partner promised you a day out alone, just the 2 of you, and at the eleventh hour, tells you that he/she has to attend a company dinner and thus, not able to spend the whole day (e.g 12nn - 12mn) with you, how would you feel?
If your partner comes back home, and all you want to do is to tell him/her what you have found online when he/she is not around, and all the replies you got is some grunts and sounding very irritated with you, how would you feel?
Some of you would have been really angry/pissed off at all these. But frankly, I am not pissed or angry at all. All I'm feeling right now is just plain disappointment.
But you, as the person closest to me, says that I am angry over these kind of stuffs. I am not.
I keep everything to myself to avoid quarrels. I keep everything to myself to not spoil your mood/day. I keep everything to myself and pretend that everything's alright, for the sake of you. And all you can tell me is, I am petty and I shouldn't be angry over all these things which you are not able to choose or have a control over it.
Well, I really don't know what else to say if you insist that I am angry over these minor things. After all, I can be disappointed, can't I?
16:02