24 May 2009
it's my fault again... my fault for keeping the child like you ask me to, for being unhappy with the way things turns out, for voicing out my thoughts, my displeasure. you always point out my wrong, but did you think about wad lead me to saying things that are unpleasant to your ears? did you think about wad you said that lead me to thinking things that are the opposite to wad you actually meant? personally, i think that all that you've mentioned when you're voicing out your displeasure, you just want me to change till like your boss, Chris's wife... 'tho you always say you don't want me to change you anything. if you don't want me to change, why do you always tell me wad you're unhappy with? you said you are always the one calling me till you feel fucking frustrated.. den don't bother calling me! ever thought about why i didn't call you when you're working? reason being simply cus i don't want to disturb you when you're working and whenever i call you, talk halfway, got disconnected! i got frustrated about it too! so might as well i let you call me when the network's better or when you're free! that's wrong too?! that's my fault too?! you're comparing me with others which i don't like and i have never ever compared you to other guys and criticise/blamed you for things... i can simply abort, to quote your words, our flesh and blood and ignore your pleas to keep it. i am having a hard enough time to keep it and change my free and easy lifestyle to something restrained and constricted! you keep saying that you understand/know how hard is it for me, how difficult is it for me, but in fact, you do not understand/know it at all! if you know it, you would have understand me better... you know wad, if it's really that difficult for you on your side, just forget about it. i'll just put it up for adoption.02:49