it's been a long time since i last blogged.. so much to say.. so much to rant it out here.. so much to write.. but yet, no words that are appropriate enough to be written down here.. caught up with my sec sch fren last week.. turns out that she's still the same as 3 years ago.. didn't change at all lorx.. brought her clubbing and i can see that she didn't really enjoyed herself there... maybe it might be due to the strangeness in the environment and tons of alcohol.. hahas..

i have no idea why but my vision in blurring.. and i hate this kind of straining my eye to see something clearly de feeling and look.. sigh.. someone once promised me alot of things.. but sofar, all the things that he had done, is just for his own benefits.. all is just in the name of selfish act. well.. life's pretty crazy for me.. up till this point, i still do not know what the hell he wants.. and i'm so going to bring ET into this space once again.. there's just so much inside me that's yearning to be set free, to be able to voice and speak freely. but given the circumstances, that's not possible at all.

been meeting up with ET quite frequently.. been to KTV, midnight skating, clubbing, drinking sessions or even just talk cock.. cdid alot of catching up. but it seems likehis fren DW is always there. and what i really want, is to have some private time with him himself without meeting anybody at the eleventh hour or anything.. i know this sounds crazy, but den i do miss him terribly.. please do not call me and comment on this thing.. trying to run away from this fact that i'm still missing him though he did hurt me.. but den again, i found out the real reason why he does wanna break up with me the first time. there's alot of stuffs i wanna say here.. but i just feel that by writing everything down here will be like digging my own grave..

last night, ET's been treating me coolly.. i don't like this feeling but yet i do not wish to ask him. why? you may ask.. reason being the simplest is that he will just say that nothing's wrong and will call me back later which will not happen till he is appease or he has forgotten it.. so why bother to ask when you know what the person is going to say? no point isn't it? when SMC ask me why i do not ask him questions, i just tell him simply that i know the answers and it's not that i don't care. he will den ask alot of questions with a why, when, who, where, how. if he did happens to find out about this blog of mine, he will have alot of queries.. and i will be spammed by his sms-es again.. haha.. laugh if you want, it's okay.. seriously..

well, there isn't much more that i can say rght here and i'm actually surprise by myself that i can write such a long post..