15 April 2008
all you care about is just yourself. where were you when i needed your care and concern? you think i really give a damn about bear and smc de care and concern? all smc does is to make me go out with him when i'm sick. he doesn't even care whether my fever is burning or wad fuck shit. when he felt my forehead all he said was not that bad mahz when i feel my whole head burning. wad is this? is this the care and concern that i want? NO! wad i want is someone to ask me how am i feeling, have i taken my medications and what the doctor says and stop me from eating or drinking those things that i'm not suppose to! not someone who keeps asking me out and letting me eat or drink or go clubbing or do whatever fuck shit that i'm doing! you said everybody gets sick. TRUE! but who has fever for 6 days in a row?! bear stepped in at the right time. he gave me the care and concern which you should be giving me instead of him. if you had shown me a wee bit of concern, i would be happy enough and i wouldn't even be contacting him. at least he appreciate me, he cared for me like he really loves me. if you really did claim that you love me, you would have been doing that and not saying that there's alot of people around me showing me care and concern and that if you do the same thing also, you will just be another guy. you will never be just another guy in my eyes. all i wanted was really simple. just some care and concern from you! is that so fucking difficult for you? NO! den why can't you do it? there's no law or unwritten law stating that you can't care for me when there are other people around showing me their care and concern which i don't really give a damn about! dying is still the best way out! i don't have to worry about everything. i wil be stress free! how nice will it be... yea.. i should just start cutting my wrists again. look down on me if you want. i don't give a damn. hopefully, it will just be deep enough to kill me.13:56